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I am so sorry.Could you just forget me? I actually want you to this time.
I must be bipolar or have a disorder that makes me this stupid and immature.
All I do is stuff full of nonsense and I want to die.
I push things too far.
I make my friends angry.
I never mean to but it happens.
Then I cry myself to sleep.
I know how much I mess up.
I know that I am being disrespectful.
Or I'm proud for no reason.
I know you think I'm seeking attention even though you don't tell me so.
I am just being me.
Someone who can't do anything right.
I can't breath right, talk right, walk right, think right, act right, do right.
And that's the whole reason why I hate myself.
You tell me other people would be sad if I died it possibly kill themselves too.
Truth is, none of you have the guts or care enough cause all I ever do is get angry at you or make you mad or cry or disappointed..
All I do...
All I do is
Should I really trust him?Some people say I'm ugly. others say I'm cute.
some say I'm perfect. some won't tell the truth.
Then when I confront them, they tell me they don't lie,
they say that I should trust them, to that I ask them why...
They say not to listen, to their stupid lies
The hug me and they sooth me, and make me feel alright
He says not to listen, and let their words get to my head
But then I calmly told him, if that's true, then why should I trust him?
.~*The Light Within*~. Project for school... A dark shadow cast over a village in a small land. A girl stood outside the gates, staring at the riot inside with her soft green eyes.
"Why do they blame me?" hot tears began to stream down her face, "This isn't something I've done!" She turned to her only friend, A beautiful black pelted wolf dragon with a fiery blue main and patterns.
Her eyes, unseen, were replaced with black markings, yet still possessed sadness and pity that burned for the girl and the monstrosity inside the village.
The demonic creature spoke gently through mind with a dry, yet soothingly pleasant voice, "Darling, they know no better than to accuse the being they place as 'odd' among them,"
"But Neschume!" the girl stood crying, sorrowfully staring at Neschume, keeping a soft and emotionless face. "These people are all I have left that is human!" she hid her face in the fur jacket sleeves.
"Echo, you have the company of the wise and well-being the forest wolves provide you," S
''Just in-case I'' Suicide letterJust in case I grab a knife and shove it through my heart....
I love you so much that I get so confused when I try to think about how much I love you. You KNOW I want a future with you, and it's always possible, but there's a chance it wont happen. I never wanted to lose you this way. I hope you realize I never meant to be a jerk to you I never meant anything negative in our relation ship, and especially towards you. I do not joke; I LOVE YOU. Stop blaming yourself for shit. Sure you were the one who wanted to do stuff but I'm the one who didn't try to stop you. If I cared enough I would've. And if I end. Don't you dare blame yourself. DON'T YOU DARE end yourself either. You need to look after Sam. Poor boy needs help with his soul. You were born a medic. You mended my heart, help him mend his.
I love you.
I love you bro. You're so special Imma never forget ya. I hope you realize you have more than me and you just don't understand it. You kn
ICIWICIWI would, if I could,
but I can't.
So I won't.
And if I won't, then I cant,
But I could.
If I would.
This world is confusing.
Scattered like stars,
in the sky,
A wave of confusion,
on our towns.
What's left is just trash.
of some sort.
But it lets us begin again
a new heart.
Let it all die
for time's never ending.
If I tried
but I'm weakened by words.
But I can't,
build it again
even with strengthened soul.
So I won't,
Let. Me. Grow. Old.
One Step CloserTake a breath,
One step closer
Say a word,
one step closer
another step closer..
more steps closer
so much closer
Try to hold on
too much closer
Slow your breathing,
two more steps
Say your last words,
Let go, it's useless
You're already there.
I am a MouseI am a mouse.
I am quiet, I am nothing.
I am a book that nobody has read.
I am an eclipsed sun and a cloaked moon.
I am irrelevant and unwanted, a broken toy in an attic.
I am the dust in your rear-view mirror that you leave behind.
I am the air that you breathe in and spit out as something different.
I am the palest white. I am the darkest black. I am the dullest, emptiest grey.
I am the old man with forgotten memories and the baby who has yet to make them.
I am a forgotten word, dangling on the tip of your tongue, hanging on the noose of your lips.
I am a dried up stream. I am a felled forest. I am an abandoned cornucopia of resolute nothingness.
And there is Hell burning in my eyes.
PainParalized by the suffering
A shiver down my spine
Images of my past haunt me
No one can save me from this hell
to me you are perfect
I do not know the reasons
for all those scars burning
against your bright skin
you've been soaking
a pain reminiscing from past
we both cannot recollect
yet you are so beautiful..
when night gets darker
and I am the one...
who's hungered to undress
the spirit of you
slowly revealing the layers
coming off from shadows
disguised in desires
craving to be fulfilled
I will caress every corner
of your silhouette
until I figure the true shape
of your heart
I will rub those blisters
softly until every nerve
of you gushes into a river
and you moan into a life
I had promised you
years ago when we began
to breathe into each other
for all the truths
I must swallow
and lessons I must learn
you are the one
I am destined to discover
what it means
to love in perfection
i can't keep walking on these dry-rot bonesoh, i am not a poet;
like the ink scratches
of plath, i am
specter boy: decay,
dispose, & disappoint
because this is the way
that writers wane -
(this hangman head is no
survivor story, & gods
do not burn out
you talk like a travestyoh, mercury boy, you can't
write your way out of this
body or out of this mind;
you can pray like it's high-fashion,
insist you're only burning yourself out
(but tell me - do you feel like a god yet?)
if only for murky mirrors &
silver cicadas caught
in your ribcage, you've
got a knack for decaying
poem for borderlinesif i could concentrate over
seven hundred thousand eyes
at the roof to the numbers stepping
from the nicities & rows
to go back
to the shattered surface
& the ripples beating over the hang
halfway between shallow
biting lips. maybe--
she couldn't have known
that it takes a whole three minutes
for the lungs to
well, maybe she
who, oh well
the white; the haze--
the booming over
the spume and spray
me get out of my head
just pull up the shutters
my tongue the weight to talk
but that's all we'll ever be:
a match burning itself out for
under the backspray of someone else's wheels
daydreams and monsters.she was a girl.
she ran with the moon,
chased fireflies in the bluegrass, and
watched the reflection of sunsets in rain puddles.
her name was Alice,
and she was a girl.
but to the dragonflies she was a queen,
and to the mirror she was a sister.
the moon was her prince, and the
blinking windows were the eyes
that kept her safe.
she spent her nights making wishes, and she
dragged her fingers along the shooting stars
that were tangled with her vertebrae.
her name was Alice,
and she was a girl.
her body was a river
her mind was an ocean
and her heart was the sky.
she lived in a world where
doves flew in the sea and
whales swam in the
Mist, Snowflakes, Water, and back again.Waiting in a confusing atmosphere
singing a silent song of fate
glancing at the crystal glaciers
of this gigantic, icy cold, place.
Fading into clouds of mist
that hide the secret that is hidden
Floating up into the sky
only to find myself as snowflakes - broken
Finding all the scattered pieces
isn't the hardest part of all,
putting it all back together
is where I actually begin to fall
Once together I only break
this fragile surface is cracked at once
Then finally as midday comes
the pieces become melted by the sun
Woven together in partials of water
I smile over the density of pain
This beautiful feeling only lasts a while
as the ice and fog grow thick again.
Hidden in a cloud of mist
Broken into many snowflakes
Falling as I put myself together
then melted to water
where heat forms me to mist
This, is my never ending cycle.
You're Not A PoetYou’re not a poet because of strung words
Together on row upon row again
Of blank verse or perhaps liberal rhyme.
‘Slam’ all you want, other poets wonder;
Your ignorance of couplets a blunder?
Yes! I speak harshly, but it’s no gross crime,
To point with honesty failed verse of thine.
No real poet discards upper case words;
Lets prose crawl on paper like listless worms.
You seek to free verse of those stern letters,
Sever away bleak capital fetters,
But it doesn’t sing of great speech sublime,
Rather, it sneaks of writing in spare time.
Wait! before you throw me in the icy Rhine;
It’s hard to put verse together in rhyme,
To make our dull words sound great all the time,
Hear them ring out loud, like a clear clock’s chime,
Heralding a poet’s summer prime.
Yet the sacred muses weep at your crime;
Your pentameter mangled thick like slime,
The subject not gilded in raiment fine;
Your bold ink font, crystal waters divine
Tastes bitter to the ton
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Lilyas has dedicated herself to making our community a brighter place with her vibrant artwork and infectious enthusiasm for interacting with others in our community. It has certainly paid off, as many deviants flock to her page on a daily basis to let her know how much of an inspiration she is. We absolutely agree, and couldn't let all that hard work go without recognition, so it's with great pride that we bestow the Deviousness Award for March 2014, to ... Read More